Monday, August 23, 2021

Last Looks

 



Howard Michael Gould's book, Last Looks, has an unusually long first sentence for a book published in 2018: "As he scrubbed one sock in the day's supply of well water, noting that his stitches had not held and the hole in the toe had reopened, he considered once again the problem of the One Hundred Things, as he had every day, every hour of every day, for the past three years." 

The first challenge of a long sentence is making it clear. Gould meets that challenge, with generous deployment of commas and a careful order of words, all following closely together. There's no need to look back at previous parts of the sentence to understand the later parts. There are four sections, each of which almost completes a thought. First, we have a phrase that tells us what "he" is doing: "As he scrubbed one sock in the day's supply of well water;" next, something the character observes: "noting that his stitches had not held and the hole in the toe had reopened;" third, what he is thinking about: "he considered once again the problem of the One Hundred Things;" and finally, how often and how long he has thought about that: "as he had every day, every hour of every day, for the past three years." 

By keeping each portion semi-independent, Gould makes the entire sentence easier to follow. 

The next challenge of a long sentence is to make it hold attention. Here, the added information of each portion helps. So do the specific details, such as "scrubbed," "day's supply of well water," "hole," and "One Hundred Things." Each of these details is helping build a character – what he does, what he notices, what he thinks, how he does it – in precise terms. 

I'm particularly intrigued by "One Hundred Things." The capital letters both show that this is the title of a specific concept and imply that it is important to the character. I happen to have encountered the concept – it's a plan for minimalist living – but would a wide variety of readers know it? Is it a concept that will remain in the current vocabulary a decade from now? Or will it become obscure and tie the character to a specific time? The next sentences do explain the idea, so the story doesn't depend on the reader already knowing what the One Hundred Things are, but it's a less widely known reference than the fairy tales or Shakespeare some of our other first sentences have referred to. 

The first section tells us a lot about the character's lifestyle. It includes well water and mending socks. Even paying attention to a hole in a sock puts him out of the mainstream of American life. These are words that go with back-to-the-land living or earlier eras. But "One Hundred Things" seems to date to the book The 100 Thing Challenge, by Dave Bruno, published in 2010. That narrows the possible period for this story. 

The final portion of the sentence, placed where it will receive the most emphasis, is the most intense. "As he had every day, every hour of every day, for the past three years." That's a frequency of thought that suits matters of survival: sex or food or living with a predator. Somehow, the One Hundred Things have become the equivalent of life-and-death to this character. The repetition of "every" is a poetic device, showing the return of the word like the return of the thought. The constant focus on One Hundred Things is an obsession. 

I found the character intriguing. I was a little unsure through the book whether the narrator admired or had contempt for this obsession, and I also was unclear on the tone of the book at times. That's okay. An occasional ambiguous read is a pleasant stretch. It feels fresh, now and then, for an author to leave their judgments complex. 

Graphic elements by Ken Silbert

Photo by Taylor Simpson on Unsplash

2 comments:

Portia Elan said...

I appreciate the thoughtful breakdown, looking both at grammar and meaning. I haven’t read the text, but the carefulness of this first sentence makes me wonder if it doesn’t contain tensions that run throughout: obsessive thought patterns and the struggle to mend that which cannot be fixed.

Anna Paradox said...

Thank you! You're definitely right about the obsessive thought patterns. Whether what he struggles to mend cannot be fixed... is a more complex question.